I do struggle with feeling confident with every other role I have taken on in my life- wife, daughter, sister, friend, etc. The one that bothers me the most is my role as a wife, because I feel like for the most part, before Mia, I was a dang good wife!
Eric and I married young, he was 22 and I was 20, and we wouldn't change a thing! We have matured together, grown together, and figured out a lot of the hard parts of marriage together! But I come up with new items to add to the list each day that I need to become better at for Eric, for myself and for our relationship. As we've experienced different trials in our marriage, we both have to learn how to react, communicate, and work together to get through each rough spot on top and stronger than ever together. And it's hard! Marriage is hard! But it is oh so worth it!
Something I am trying to overcome right now is that I've noticed as I'm teaching Mia, watching her personality come out I am her biggest influence (next to Eric) on how she reacts to different situations. I am helping mold the kind of girl she will be as she grows by guiding her through the emotions she feels. Quite frankly, I'm a bossy mom sometimes but she's a year and a half! I have to be bossy, put my foot down, and teach her some boundaries because that's what she needs! The bad thing is that I find myself doing the same things to Eric... which is a problem since he's a grown man and doesn't need his wife treating him like he's a toddler! We are supposed to be working together instead of me laying down the law, ha ha! But seriously. It sounds ridiculous when I type it out, and even scarier because I know I'll have even more eyes watching the kind of wife I'll be and if I can overcome the things I'm saying now. It's scary because I'll fail. I'll fail multiple times before I start getting it right.
Becoming a mother and loving my sweet baby with little fears in the back of my mind has been the easiest, most natural thing I've ever experienced. Navigating the rest of my life as a new mother has not. It's been hard, but it will be worth it to figure this stuff out! Eric and I have already come a long way as we've discovered how to reconnect after that major life changes that a baby brings, and eventually I will come full circle and be the wife he needs in every aspect! It's just really scary admitting out loud that I have been failing and feeling like I'm the only one who has been sucking at something that I take such pride in! But one day I will perfect my wifey skills again and I will be better!
P.S. Last chance to enter this giveaway for a beauty basket!
Aug 28: Feeling confident as a mom (How to feel this way, Your struggle with, etc.)