Thursday, September 5, 2013

give it to me straight

It's strange how a complete stranger can touch your life in a matter of seconds. He can say something so simple, yet so powerful, that it stays with you forever. Once upon a time (because that sounds better than "years ago" or "back when I was engaged" because I've been realizing that I wasn't just engaged last year... oh my. I'm getting old!) a man walked into my salon and asked for a haircut. I sat him in my chair and excitedly told him of my upcoming wedding plans and bragged about my amazing fiance! He asked if he could share some advice and of course I said yes! He told me (and I wish I could remember his exact wording but this was years ago and I suffered from pregnancy brain and now I've developed mommy brain) to bite my tongue when I get tempted to call my husband a bad name because no matter how often I compliment him, or how many pet names I have for him, or how sweet and loving I am to him... he will always remember "that one time I called him _____". At the time I couldn't imagine ever wanting to fight with Eric, or yell at Eric, or call him an awful name... but goodness, marriage tests your patience in ways I never knew it could! And it only takes one word to break down the heart. That moment of anger is not worth the heart ache that will be remembered for far too long. When I finished the haircut and that man walked out the door, he walked out of my life, but those words will stick with me forever! Thanks to that obvious but needed advice, I hope to always take it to heart and be a better wife, mom, friend, person.
What piece of advice do you just love? I am always in need of words that help me become better!

 

19 comments:

Niken said...

oh man, thank you for sharing that advice. i will (try) to always remember it. my mom used to say to me to never leave the house without your husband's leave, no matter how angry you are at the time. there's no turning back.

Amanda @ Eloquent English said...

that is great advice!

Laurie @ The Rookie Wife said...

This is great advice, and very true! We love our husbands, but sometimes our stressful lives lead us to take out frustrations on each other because we have nobody else to take them out on. One of my girlfriends husband just died, (he was tragically hit by a car) and she told me the other day "think twice before you fight over something silly. Will it really matter that much that he didn't take the trash out before he went to bed?" So for these past few days I've been biting my tongue when something nasty is about to slip. In reality, those silly things don't matter.

Tammy Jo said...

Such a very true statement!!!

Jen @ Love, the Arthurs said...

What a great piece of advice. It's so simple, yet we don't ever think of it like that. It's easy to brush it off cause we know we were just mad and obviously really didn't mean it, but words sting and especially mean ones, leave a lasting impression on us. Thanks for that reminder!

misty said...

yep.
totally can't Undo the hurt that words cause.
Once it's out there, there's no bringing it back.
great advice.

K&R said...

so so so true.
best advice i was given.

K

CoastWithMe said...

That is such great advice and I believe it wholeheartedly! Sometimes we get caught up in the moment and say things we don't mean, but those words can't be taken back. So, this man was totally right! Btw, thank you so much for visiting my blog! Would you like to follow each other?

Kim Matheson said...

That is great advice. I love that - thank you for sharing it! :)

Erin LFF said...

What a great piece of advice, and what a sweet man to offer that to the bride-to-be ;) Love it!

Jamie @ You Gotta Have Hart said...

I've heard that advice before and it's SO true! People never seem to remember the good but always want to focus on the bad. It's kind of like when you are dating someone and you go to tell your best friend or your parents that ONE thing they did to make you mad or hurt your feelings-- that person seems to dwell on that one little thing for the longest time and remind you of it forever!

ugottahavehart.blogspot.com

Annabelle said...

That is great advice! I've always made sure that I tell my husband I love him even if I' mad. And to never go to bed mad. You hear it all the time and it rings true. Sometimes us women hold on to things way too long. (I am one of those women.) So wake up happy and in love everyday! ;)

Kerry said...

What a lovely and wise piece of advice! I love it when things like that stick with you forever...you guys are so cute together!

CTS said...

This is AWESOME advice. Thanks for sharing!

www.livingingenuity.com

Just Dont Tell Anyone said...

I just LOVED that!!! This is awesome! What a great advice, and so true! Really! I think I'm doing quite well with that, I never name people in bad names. No matter what. But have heard many of them myself, have been named bad, and ya know.. it really stays with you forever. I could tell every single bad name told to me, by every single person. I even remember the years, and the places when these happened. This is so so so true.

RadiantKristen said...

That is fantastic advice! So glad that a total stranger was able to influence your life in such a positive way!

Dinah Gacon said...

When (my) Eric and I got married his aunt and uncle on our wedding day said that its always important to say I love you as many chances as you can say it to eachother in a day. Even if Eric just drives to the super market or I leave for work, we always say I love you...

xo Dinah @ sunshine super glam

Janna Renee said...

This is great advice and so true! I try not to say things in anger and I NEVER want to call Will a bad name. I hate the thought of even accidentally hurting him, so I could never.

Heather said...

That is an amazing piece of advice! One SMART man!

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